Hello, everyone. I’ve gotten so much feedback from my blog over the last few months and I want to say thank you for your opinions and advice. You all know who you are and even though some of you really upset me with your responses I learned a lesson or two about people and about myself. One of the things I learned is to not take it so personally that people have their opinions about what I say. My blog gets hits from 25 countries and almost 100 views a month, it would be naive of me to think every single one of those people agree 100% with everything I write.
More recently I’ve taken a step back from people to do some observing. It was quite eye opening. I wanted to see, who was invested in my life. I wanted to see who was invested in me. I knew I had followers, I knew I had viewers, but I needed to see how far past social media some of my friendships were. I found out within a week what I needed to know. I’ve been a month without a few social media accounts and I honestly have no desire to go back. I love staying mostly in my lane. I have two accounts that I frequent but that’s more for me. I don’t use it to maintain friendships or keep tabs on anyone. I use them for hilarious videos, articles, and information. The tone of my two accounts are much different than snapchat and Instagram. I love that people only know what’s going on with me because they talk to me. I love that I only know what’s going on with people because I talk to them. Its so healthy. I appreciate it.
I find my life ironic at this point. One of the reasons I removed myself from social media was so that I could stay in my own lane. However, I found myself in 3 situations recently that led me to be WAY outside my lane. The situational irony was too hilarious for me to handle and I actually was hysterically laughing to the point of tears in my house. My brother thought I was crazy and suggested that I needed to write a blog about it. I know people will talk soooo much after this post and think so many things but it brings me joy inside to know I don’t care ☺️. But, for the record, I really came from a place of wanting to help these people. I wouldn’t say I was nosey but rather, invested in helping them get through tough situations. The following are the three situations in which I found myself in someone else’s lane.
I’m not sure if any of you take the 7 train, but if you do, you know there are an assortment of individuals that ride that line. A wide assortment. As I was on my commute home from work I heard a loud voice at the other end of the car and I wasn’t alarmed because it’s so often that people give speeches, or sing, or ask for money, or are just loud that I wasn’t effected by it. I left my headphones on my desk, so I could hear everything this guy was saying. At first I thought he was on the phone and I thought to myself “Wow, what a jerk. I can’t believe that person hasn’t hung up on him yet.” At the next stop, a homeless person came onto my car and she smelt so bad I had to move. When I got up, I realized this dude wasn’t on the phone, he was speaking to his girlfriend who was sitting right next to him-silent. I instantly felt so bad for this girl, both of them could’t be more than 18 years old. I thought to myself “This girl doesn’t deserve this she’s way too young for that nonsense. For the next 5 minutes I listened to him berate her, curse her, embarrass her, degrade her, and belittle her and my stomach was in knots as she sat there silently with tears streaming down her face. It felt like an hour but we finally pulled into the Main Street stop and she jumped up so quick and quickly walked up the stairs but he was right behind her and I happened to be right behind them. He was so focused on yelling at her that he took a couple seconds to realize she wasn’t exiting the station she took a turn and headed right toward the Manhattan bound tracks and had every intention of leaving him behind (you go, girl!). This Is where I came in. I saw he had no idea she was doing this so I stepped behind her and whispered “act like you know me.” We greeted each other with a kiss on the cheek and acted like we were catching up. By the time he realized she wasn’t near him he had already exited the turnstyle and he was not interested in swiping back in to retriever her. He kept calling out to her but then when he realized she was possibly talking to someone she knew he instantly stopped talking and just stood there observing. It seemed to me he wasn’t trying to look crazy in front of any potential friends (he’s young so you know how image is a thing). I told her she deserved better and she should never let anyone speak to her like that. She agreed with me and she mentioned she just wanted to go home so I walked her down the Manhattan tracks and waited with her until the train came. Once she got on the train I went my way. My heart goes out to her and I hope she’s well tonight.
This second situation I think would be one a lot of people would find themselves in. The thing with me in this situation is that I always find things out, whether I want to or not. So my coworker has been having issues with an ex. He borrowed a lot of money from her (like a lot) and then ghosted. If you don’t know what ghosted means, it’s when a person makes themselves impossible to reach like changing their number, address, or removing social media seemingly overnight. She’s been trying for months to get in touch with him via his old number and found herself giving up. Once she fully disclosed the entire story to me, I was like “oh no girl, we gonna find this boy and he’s gonna give you that money.” So basically after a couple of days of gathering information and spending time on the internet I was able to find his address, new phone number, his mother’s address, and his brother’s work phone number. So I called his mother. She was a huge help. Then I stood along side my coworker as she called his brother and they negotiated some terms that I probably shouldn’t give you the details of. Basically though, I helped her gain courage and stood alongside her in a situation in which she felt helpless. I definitely went above and beyond but I literally couldn’t help myself. I’d do it again for her in a second. However, I found myself in someone else’s business and this is the situation where I realized I haven’t been staying in my lane. The final situation is the most recent one and this situation really put me over the top and what sent me into a fit of hysteria at the irony of my life.
This last situation I really went outside of my lane for and it’s a short story but it’s a story nonetheless. Someone forwarded me information about an individual I went to college with and I found myself on a young woman’s Facebook page named Caroline. Hey girl👋🏼 Although the information she posted shocked me, I couldn’t help but realize this isn’t the first time I’ve read something like this! All too often I’ve heard of young women’s pictures being used for fake profiles but the extent of what those girls went through was above and beyond acceptable. Caroline and other girls were victims of a sexual predator. This dude defamed her and did wildly inappropriate things in her name. I messaged Caroline and told her that she needed to be strong and continue in the fight. We exchanged a few messages and I’ve offered my blog as a platform for whatever she needs. She asked me to share her story. In times like these young women need to feel supported opposed to shamed. There are things society will blame and shame young women for instead of staying focused on the main point. So Caroline I’ve got your back and I’m here for you. I don’t know you but I got you. The road ahead is one that requires courage and perseverance and women everywhere support you!
At the end of the day I still don’t find myself being a busybody. I come from a place of wanting to empower women to stand up for themselves. There should never be a day where a young girl or women limits herself because of optics. So that’s why I did what I did. Even still, I couldn’t help but laugh at myself. Why can’t I stop? Haha
I don’t know the answer to that question but I really enjoyed sharing these stories with my brother, Sam. He encouraged me to write a blog abut a young girl that was targeted by a sexual predator and yeah we figured I’d get mixed reviews but that’s okay. Thanks for always supporting me, Sam! #bestbrotherawargoesto
So if you made it to this point I’m sure you’ve got a lot of thoughts running through your mind. Good! I hope you benefit or at least find your own sense of empowerment in your own situations. Thank you for reading my thoughts. Like my title says I am the thoughts of a youth. I’ll find my way and I’ll learn as the years go on. Thank again for reading!